*sigh*
I haven't heard from my Squishy since Thursday and it's Sunday now. I'm starting to get really worried that something happened to him. I just hope that everything is ok with him. I'm just so worried right now.Well, my brother and sister came over yesterday. We went out to eat and then they came back to the house and we just chilled. lol...Kristie is pregnant and she is starting to show. It's funny...I can hardly believe that my brother is gonna be a father. ACK!! I'm gettin old...lol...
I went to church this morning. It was pretty good. Josh, my pastor, was pretty wound up. He sure did get his message across. I was supposed to have Praise Team Practice, but we didn't. Casie, one of the girls in it, couldn't go and Josh said that he couldn't make it. So, I cancelled it b/c the last time that I tried to handle them on my own, it was a disaster. They just didn't respect me and we didn't get anything done. We were supposed to debut next Sunday night, but since we haven't practiced in 3 weeks, that might not happen.
I had a very interesting converstion with one of my fellow band members yesterday. We have thing called "fair share" where everyone in band is required to pay a certain amount of money, whether it's raised though fundraisers or you just pay out of pocket. Well, there is this one guy that hasn't paid his fairshare since he's been in high school. And it's not like it's a lot of money to pay. For one year, it's about $300, but we have fundraisers to help us get this money in and we have plenty of notice to get the money. Well, he has never even paid half of his fair share in the 4 years of high school. Our county has passed a new law that states that band organizations canNOT charge fair share fees. That means that if someone had been lacking the whole year and not paid one penny, they definatley don't have to now b/c of the new Act that they have passed. Well, this guy, Derek, owed over $100 for just this year, which he never paid for the other years and I know this b/c my mom was the treasurer for the band.
Yesterday I told him that is wasn't right for all of that did pay our fairshare and busted our butts trying to do so. He came back at me and said," Yes it is b/c I have done a lot for the band, I am doing a lot for the band, and I will continue to do a lot for the band." Oh, that made me so mad!! I have worked just as hard as he has, if not harder b/c of my physical conditions. I have a bad ankle, a bad knee, and a bad back, so I go out there on that field and bust my butt and work and work for that band. But I still paid my fair share.
I owe $19.43. I told mom yesterday that if Derek wasn't gonna have to pay his, then I wasn't gonna pay mine. But the more and more that I have thought about it, I don't want to lower myself to his standards. When I agreed to stay in the band this year, that was like signing a contract saying that I would pay my fair share, and I don't like to go back on my word. So, I am going to do the Christian thing and pay my $19.43.
I know that said some things that I shouldn't have, but when anger gets you, it's hard to control that lil' devil sitting on your shoulder. I'm not trying to make an excuss, don't get me wrong, but it's so hard to resist temptation. I just wish that when that lil' devil is sitting on my shoulder, I would just look at the other shoulder and see that Jesus is right there for me. He is always there for me.
I haven't been doing like I should lately. It's not like I have been going out partying and getting drunk or having PMS (pre-marital sex), but just in my actions. What I say, how I say it, or just how I look on my face sometimes. It's just hard to live in the world today and not be tempted or just be "mean." I have to constantly work on not being too negative. I am so pessimestic sometimes that I even hate myself. That is one thing that the devil trys to get me down with, pessimism.
Well, I think I have sufficiently bored you, to whoever is reading this. lol...Toodles!
*~*God Bless*~*
posted by *~*HollyMarie*~* @ 12:44 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home